The Weeping Rose

i just dont really know what to do. i dont want to lose my last chance. i dont want to miss out on something and wonder later in life, "what if..." thats my one real goal. i want to be able to say, there were no "what ifs..." i came, i saw, and i did. "i am willing to do anything..." those words ring in my ears. a last chance. a singular last chance. what the hell am i supposed to do? i dont really wanna do this now. i dont really feel this way now. i dont really want to feel this way now. im not in the right place to do this now. but here i stand, i am given these circumstances with very inconvenient timing and so im just sitting here. my head really doesnt know what to think

taking her frustration out on her covers she rolls back other to her other side for the hundred and first time, pushing the covers down to her waist and her hands under her pillow. she tried to close her eyes and relax them... *pause* getting no where. she opens her eyes again and glares at the room lit by the light coming in through her window.